Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice trailer breakdown

Here’s the new Batman V Superman trailer, but with fun captions!

trailer breakdown

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LET’S START WITH A PARTY! Clark Kent plays the nobody-writer while Bruce Wayne shows up in his fancy vintage car. This is basically the start of Notting Hill.

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“Who’s that?” asks Clark Kent. “You must be new,” answers the fella standing closest to him (Jimmy Olsen? Eh?). Seriously, this is how every high school rom com begins. What are you planning, Batman V Superman?

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THE FIRST MEETING! And it’s filled with tension. Now it’s more of a romantic drama than a rom com.

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“What’s your position on the Bat vigilante in Gotham?” Bruce, could you BE any more obvious?

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Clark plays the Devil’s Advocate/hypocrite as he accused Batman of thinking he’s above the law. That’s kind of the point of vigilantism, man.

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Bruce calls out The Daily Planet’s hypocrisy. Clark is offended. The Super-rage is starting to brew.

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“I have a bad history with freaks dressed like clowns…” SHUT UP, BRUCE. YOU’RE GOING TO GIVE YOURSELF AWAY. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?

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Lex is far too excited. Although this look at him is a lot more interesting then the whispering, sinister peek we got of him in the last trailer. This version feels more original than the classic deadpan comic book villain.

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“That is a good grip! You should not pick a fight with this person.” Does Lex KNOW? Is that a sign? Or is the script just not very good?

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Wow, xenophobic much, people of Washington DC?

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ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! This basically confirms that Bruce is pissed off about Superman destroying the Wayne Enterprises building. “That son of a bitch brought the war to us,” says Batman.

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“The greatest gladiator match in the history of the world.” This film is just going to be one giant VFX battle, isn’t it? Not the emotional superhero drama we yearn for?

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“You’re psychotic,” says Lois. “That is a three-syllable word for any thought too big for little minds,” says Lex. Urgh, Lex is the worst.

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What the F is going on here? Why is Batman in the desert? Why is he wearing a coat? Are those weird flying things Darkseid’s Parademons?

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OH WOW, CLARK, LOOK! YOUR NEW FRIEND BRUCE IS ACTUALLY BATMAN! BET YOU DIDN’T SEE THAT ONE COMING?

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So is that the illusion ruined now? Or is it a dream sequence?

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Oh hey, Mercy Graves, nice to see you. What’s in the box, my friend?

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HOLY SHIT IT’S ZOD. ZOD IS IN THE BOX.

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“If man won’t kill God, the devil will do it!” Lex is absolutely off his head and has gone and created Doomsday. Maybe this will be the thing to bring our heroes together.

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When this baby hits 88 miles per hour, you’re going to see some serious shit.

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All hope seems lost, but then suddenly WONDER WOMAN! Maybe she’ll have more screen time than we previously thought.

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Superman: “Is she with you?” Batman: “I thought she was with you.” Aww, look at you two, finally bonding! All it took was a woman.

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YAAAASSSSSSS TEAM! YOU JUSTICE THE HELL OUT OF THAT SHIT!

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Fin. 

Watch the new trailer here:

Batman V Superman is in UK cinemas from 25 March. Get all the latest superhero news with every issue of SciFiNow.