So Sam Raimi has departed and taken Tobey Maguire with him, meaning a new direction for Sony’s webslinging franchise. What better way, then, to get excited about the new films than an inane list or two…
FIVE REASONS WHY WE LOVE THE SPIDEY REBOOT…
1. It’ll be like Ultimate Spider-Man
By setting the Spidey story back in high school halls, we can safely assume that Sony will take one or two cues from Brian Michael Bendis’s Ultimate Spider-Man, a comic that did a great job of reinvigorating the franchise on comic shelves.
2. No more RoboGoblin
Willem Dafoe looks more like a goblin than any other actor ever, so instead of accentuating his otherwise perfect features and putting him in the classic get-up, what did Raimi do? Put him in a suit that made him look like RoboCop after he’d been rolling around in the grass for too long. The reboot should mean a new Goblin – we like.
3. We can anticipate Venom again
After finally seeing Venom on the big screen in the collapsing circus that was Spider-Man 3, we can now look forward to waiting another three films or so before we see him again. Still, at least we can hope that he’ll be handled with more respect than he was in that.
4. Peter The Klutz
As much as we love Raimi’s Parker, we didn’t have as much fun with him as we would have liked. The new Parker will hopefully have a lot more social catastrophes, the sort we can both sympathise with and laugh about.
5. More Spider-Man
Regardless of its status as a sequel or reboot, the new film means more Spider-Man on screen. Few blockbusters, comic book or otherwise, chime as well with us as Spider-Man 2 so the chance to see yet more web-swinging action from the wonderful wallcrawler is very welcome indeed.
…AND THE FIVE REASONS WHY WE DON’T
1. Director, no more
Spider-Man 3 was the cinematic equivalent of being assaulted by a toy chest, so we were hardly excited about his return. That said, there was a comfort in knowing that the franchise was in the hands of a proven director who wasn’t afraid to impose himself on a series as big as this. Sony, however, will probably be more inclined to avoid the potential disputes the appointment of a big-name helmer might bring with it and plump for The Man From Del Monte.
2. Rosemary Harris
Sony won’t find a better Aunt May. And while we’re at it, it’ll do well to find a better J Jonah Jameson too.
3. Origin story… again
Did you know that Peter Parker was once bitten by a radioactive (or genetically-modified, depending on your preference) spider? Did you know that said spider bite gave him the proportionate strength and speed of a spider? Did you know that Parker used his abilities for selfish gain until his irresponsible actions lead to his Uncle Ben being killed, thus teaching the adage ‘With great power comes great responsibility’? Of course you did. Move on.
4. For kids
Despite its success among adults, Raimi’s series did especially well in the younger demographic and there is a fear that the reboot, with its younger cast, will be aimed more towards children than the previous franchise instalments. Now kids films can be fun, but we’d rather the ‘something for everyone’ remit of the first films remained.
5. No more Maguire
With Tobey Maguire we had a good Peter Parker. He was a little geeky, a little odd, a little funny… a little of everything that made us like the character in the first place. The worry is now that they’ll replace him with an annoying snot who can’t act his way through a nativity play but by God is he irritatingly handsome.
